Well I'm up early this morning. I think I've had about 12 hours of sleep. I was pretty exhausted but there's a reason for that. Yesterday was my last day of work and I am now on a 15 day hiatus from work! I can't help but be ecstatic about it. I am definitely in good spirits.
This past week has been a bit stressful for the most part but I think a lot of the stress was work related which is something that many people experience in their daily lives now-a-days. As I stated in my last post, I've started a new medication. It's an SSRI called Pexeva. It is basically the same as Paxil only a newer version. I've started taking a whole pill now instead of just half. It's 20 mg.
The low down on the pill is that it really does help with the delusional thinking and the ritual activity isn't nearly as bad. I seem to be in a better mood now which is good for a change. The only real down side to this medication is that it seems to really desensitize me meaning that having an orgasm during sex is quite a task. I still am highly sexual. I haven't lost my desire at all. I'm gonna give it a little while because this may just be a temporary side effect that might go away as my body acclimates to the medication. We shall see....
I'm thinking that now would be a good time for me to begin working on how I see things in life. How I think about things and start trying to change my belief system. I think if I can start doing this it will help me be able to handle my OCD without the medication. And with me being off work for the next 15 days, this should be a great time to start.
One of the first things I need to work on is focusing on the things that have a tendency to trigger those unwanted thoughts and anxiety. The biggest culprit for me is caffeine. I am totally addicted to Starbucks. I love their venti mocha frappucincos and double chocolate brownies. Both of which are terrible for my diabetes. Yes, I have that too unfortunately. lol
Anyway that's about where I'm at right now. All I can do is take things one day at a time. That's my plan.
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